Don’t look at me that way. This has nothing to do with me. Well not directly at any rate.

I have a friend who is in the process of breaking up. I say process because according to me, it’s more or less a done thing, but you know what they say “fools in love/lust”… It is taking longer than I think it should and I think it is imperative that I be the good friend I know I am and give her a boost in the right direction.

It strikes me that I might be advocating to kick the guy to the curb because I am tired of being the friend that holds her hand, who she comes to when she wants to voice her inner debates. There are times I just want to shake her and tell her she deserves way more than what he is giving her.

You might think I am being a bit too rash. Let me break it down. Tell you what this chap did. Well what rumor says he did anyway and from the way he is acting, he might as well be guilty. He is sleeping with this other chick because my friend will not sleep with him. I say, “Kudos to her! You don’t know where he has been and with whom!”

I don’t want to believe the cliché about all men being dogs but sometimes it rings true.

What happened to abstinence? To all those campaigns Y.E.A.H, ministry of Health and their various assortments of friends hustle to run? About being responsible? About being a man, making choices today that will save you tomorrow?

Men argue that they since they are easily stimulated, they cannot control their baser instincts, they just have to find ways to “fix the problem”. I like the rebuttal to this argument.

God made man (men and women) different from all His other creations. He made man with the ability to choose/make decisions for himself. He gave man free will. So for you to stand up and say is you could not control yourself, you had to get some is total fallacy.

Back to this guy.

After the initial tears and pointing fingers session, the girl took the boy back. You should have seen the disbelief written all over me. The mad chick that I am, I would never have done that but then, women are suckers which I so understand! But sometimes we need to have a real good back bone and just not give in to that crap.

The twist in this tale came a few days later. Suddenly she cannot do anything right according to him. She walks out of parties, she always puts him down, and she doesn’t care one bit about him and his friends.

Then some more drama, he said he had never met a woman like her who is not shy about embarrassing him. W.T.F.

I felt that blow like I was the one in the relationship. By the time I have put up with your crap for more than 11 months and then you suddenly wake up and declare that I am an embarrassment to you? What have the last months been about? Have you suddenly found your embarrassment meter?

This is when you realize how deceitful men can be. Okay, that’s a bit too much of a generalization to fly but this is when you realize how deceitful relationships can be. You think after you have been through the shzznut would realize how much you have put in.

So my question is when is the right time to break off a relationship?

First a confession.

I am having a hard time trying to make up my mind about what to write about or how to write out what I want to.

I have heard (read) many of you say things about Mr.B2B and some how I think I am expected to be the female version of a player gone good.

That’s an accurate description to some extent but the difference is, it only went down in my head.

Second, I just want to be me.

So without further a do, I ask the following questions.

1. Why don’t people make full confessions on their blogs and keep us guessing?
2. Am I allowed to haggle with people over their posts and re-write my version on my blog?

Hope you all know I’m joking about no. 2, right? That would be sheer madness, for real!

This is a universal question, although most men will argue that it is women who are more complex and thus the other question which is also a movie that Mel Gibson stared in being more common. But really, what do you guys want?

The book Men Are From Mars and Women Are From Venus clarifies on a few things but doesn’t make it crystal clear. Men can really have issues and are very different from us.

He asks, ‘What do you want?’

When you do tell him, he trips that you are too demanding or you are giving too many details and at the end of the day, you are asking yourself, do you want me or just image of your dream woman? All docile and very blond, a yes woman all the time to your liking. At that point, I am thinking, why did you bloody ask if you don’t want to know!

For them, they have a different set of rules and then for us, and they change according to their liking. When he cheats – it’s in their genes. When she cheats – she’s a whore. W.T.F.

The first a guy I dated at uni was a serious bad boy, I like them like that. The thing is, I told him that I wouldn’t sleep with him if we dated because I wanted to wait till I got married, asked him if he was cool with that and if he would handle it. He confidently said that he would. 6 weeks into our relationship and he was like,

‘Honey please. I want you so so so bad, please!’

I was dumbfounded. Wouldn’t hold it against him for all that coz it would obviously happen when we were making out.

This book (His Needs, Her Needs) which is a Christian’s guidebook for marriage kind of cleared it all up for me. Dr. Harley explains the husband’s needs starting with the most important and numero uno was sexual fulfillment.

That actually surprised me, but clears a lot of questions.

Gentlemen, it would be good to hear from you, so don’t be shy. Tell us, what do you want?

I am all woman and he is my man...